Now that I think about it...

Why did I even suggest the stupid idea in the 1st place?

The one that once he gets into Uni, we break up so that he can try other relationships

Yes its true that I am sheltering him too much for him to grow..

but still...I am worried..and scared that he will leave me..

And his greatest weakness is that he can only love one person at a time..

I worry that once he finds someone else,

he falls in love..and then even though the girl may not be as good as me,

he dun have the heart to leave her and break up with her..

so in the end..I will be the one left alone because of the circumstances..

this is what I foresee will happen..

Once you hold on to love, you must really hold on to it else you may never find it again..

But I know he needs to grow,

he needs to learn..

And I have no choice but to let go, for his sake..

Selfishly I really dun want to let go..

But its for his good, its for his future..I will let go..

Its a super big risk considering the heart and effort I place into him..

And despite all the super hurtful words i posted here about him..

I have to say..

I really love him truly from the bottom of my heart..

For now, I think i just focus on my life

then await my impending doom..

lolx..

and treasure the time we have left till that fateful day..